Speaking of Speech Impediments…
Posted on March 2, 2011 by Ching under Confessions, Family, Life.
Remember how my biological father didn’t know that I had a speech impediment just like his when I was growing up? I can’t really blame him since he didn’t really know me well enough to know how much we had in common. He knew of my existence, but I didn’t know of his until I was about 11 or 12 years old. I didn’t actually get to meet him until I was 21, and we only spent a couple of weeks together. Not long enough to really get to know one another. And, I’d already lived in the US about five years when we met. I think moving to the US is what cured me.
Well… My speech impediment isn’t really cured. It’s just less evident. Somehow I don’t have much of a problem when I’m speaking English. It’s only apparent when I’m speaking Tagalog. Honestly, I would have completely forgotten about my speech impediment if things didn’t remind me of this flaw every now and then.
A lot of people don’t know of this flaw until I tell them. Actually, I don’t even think Brian knew until a few years ago when he was trying to learn how to speak Tagalog. He asked me to pronounce one of the words for him because he had trouble saying it. I read it to him, and then read it to him again because he looked confused. It didn’t seem like he was getting it so I had to say it a few times. Finally, he was like “Baby! There are no L’s in this word?!” So I had to explain to him that my R’s sound like L’s or W’s whenever I speak Tagalog.
I told him how I was tormented by all my friends and classmates growing up because of this. They would always make me say words that they knew I wasn’t capable of saying properly just so they could laugh at my expense. Para (which sounds like pawa when I say it) and araw (comes out as either awaw or alaw) were two words that I’d be asked to say frequently.
“Great! I’m learning to speak Tagalog from someone who has a speech impediment,” Brian said, a little frustrated. “I’m going to sound like a retard!”
“Trust me,” I told him. “If anyone makes fun of you when you’re speaking Tagalog, it won’t be because of your R’s. It’ll be because of the way you mispronounce everything else.” LOL.
Anyway, it’s just in Tagalog that I have a problem saying R’s. I don’t have the same issue with English words. I think that’s mostly how I’ve gotten by without people being aware of my speech impediment. That is, of course, until I tell them. When I’m inebriated I tend to overshare.
I found myself in such a situation that night we were at Stacy and Jeff’s for the sushi party a couple of weeks ago. I’m not sure how we got into the subject of speech impediments, but I ended up sharing mine. I confessed it almost like I was at an AA meeting, “Hi, I’m Ching and I have a speech impediment.”
Well, not quite but sort of…
And then “Say something! Say something!” inevitably followed. I had flashbacks of my tormented childhood when I’d actually oblige my tormentors and say the words that they’d ask me to say. There was really no point in me saying some Tagalog words because none of them would know whether or not I was pronouncing the words correctly. However, since I’d put myself out there, I felt the need to explain.
The only way I can describe it is that many of the R’s in Tagalog sound a lot like the double R’s in Spanish. I cannot say those at all to save my life. So that’s how I described it to these folks I’d just recently met. They were like, “I can’t say the double R’s in Spanish either.”
So I was like, “Maybe you’d have a speech impediment too, if you had to speak Tagalog.” LOL. Maybe I’m just meant to be American. I do tend to fit in a little better here. Well, not really. Most of the time I don’t think I fit in anywhere. I do feel less out of place. At least, I don’t have a speech impediment in English!
Now, the accent… That’s something else altogether that I may never be able to overcome. LOL.
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