I’m Naming It Bob
Posted on February 4, 2006 by Ching under Life.
Next time I get a tag mole, I’m keeping it and naming it Bob. The procedure I had yesterday was just downright scary, not to mention painful.
Mom and dad and Brian have been encouraging me to get my tag mole removed. They said it would be a quick and painless process. I knew better so I decided not to do anything about it. I kept my tag mole for several months. I think maybe even over a year. I don’t remember when I first noticed it. It just showed up one day and kept getting bigger and bigger as each day passed.
When mom and dad returned from the Philippines, they told me that they had this lazer pen thing that they brought back from their trip to burn off their tag moles. They also bought some numbing medicine. Mom offered to remove mine but I declined because mine was on the edge of my lower right lid. It’s too close to my eyes to take a chance.
So I have this tag mole that I’ve been enduring simply because I’m too chicken to get it removed. I’m weird, I know. I get my bikini waxed (I actually have an appointment for it today) on a regular basis and manage to do just fine (okay so maybe I whine about it quite a bit, I still go though) but I can’t get a little tag mole removed.
It came to a head last Friday (pardon the pun). As I was messing with the despicable growth, I actually pulled part of it off. Needless to say, it began bleeding profusely. Panicked, I called Brian immediately and told him what I had done. I was so scared that I actually agreed to get it removed.
Thus, yesterday’s doctor’s visit came about. February 3 was the first day that they could get me in. The funny thing is my last visit to their office was almost exactly two years ago on February 1, 2004. I hate going to the doctor. You all probably already knew that, though.
So anyway, I came expecting some kind of sophisticated tag mole removal procedure. Guess what he did. He simply cut them off with these scissors. They looked like those small cuticle scissors that are included in most manicure sets. I’m glad I didn’t know that is what he would do. And I’m glad that I had my eyes closed the whole time. Had I seen him coming at me with these scissors, I probably would have starting freaking out. Actually, if I knew he was going to cut them off I probably would have just said “No, thanks. I’m going back to work. See you in a couple of years!” I wouldn’t have needed to see the scissors at all. Just the idea scares me.
“It hurts! It hurts! It hurts!” I exclaimed with my eyes still tightly shut.
“I’m done,” he says.
“You said it wouldn’t hurt,” I complained
“It didn’t hurt me one bit,” he said jokingly. I wasn’t in a laughing mood, though.
“Am I bleeding?” I asked.
“No,” he said. “You can open your eyes now.”
“I’m scared,” I said. And I really was, too. I was imagining blood gushing out all over the place.
“Does it still hurt?” he asked as he dab the tears from my right eye with a cotton ball. I wasn’t crying or anything, but my eye watered up from the pain.
“Kind of,” I said as I slowly opened my eyes. He told me that he would put a piece of surgical tape on it so that the cut would heal nicely. Which made me wonder exactly what had just taken place so I said, “You know what it felt like? It felt like you cut it off with a pair of scissors.”
“Well,” he said pausing for a moment. “That’s probably because that’s exactly what I did.”
“Are you serious?” This is me freaking out. Then I realized, there was no point freaking out because it was over and done with.
I’m glad that he made me lay down for the procedure. I can just imagine myself jerking from the pain and getting stabbed in the eye with the cuticle scissors.
“I can still feel it, but it doesn’t hurt as much any more.”Â
He proceeded to ask me if I want the other moles on my face removed; to which I replied with as polite a “No, thank you” as I could muster. I really wanted to say, “HELL NO!!”
I think he was trying to be funny, but all he managed to do was scare the bejeezus out of me. I think I’m going to wait five years before I see him again. As for my next tag mole? I’ll be keeping it.
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Life After Marriage » Blog Archive » And the Bill Comes on April 6, 2006
[…] Remember my tag mole removal experience? Well, guess what. We got the bill this week. Eighty freakin’ dollars! Can you believe it? If I wasn’t such a coward, I would’ve saved my money and just had Brian do it. Author: […]