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This is a map of the route that we took to work yesterday. Brian’s ridiculous way of getting me to work is marked in red. My suggestion is marked in green. And this is yet another example of why women are far superior than men.
Why in the world didn’t we just take the canal route (I-135), you might ask?
Well.. If you live here in Wichita, you’d know that yesterday was one of the foggiest days ever. As in, you had visibility only up to your nose. Naturally, these crazy Wichita drivers continue to drive recklessly anyway.
Whenever Brian drives me to work, we usually hit the Sonic that is just North of the 37th and Woodlawn intersection. From there we take Woodlawn to K-96, then K96 to I-135 South, exit on 1st and 2nd, and then voila! I’m at work. It’s a pretty short, easy drive.
Not yesterday, though.
There was a car accident that cause cops to block the on-ramp from K-96 to I-135 South. We didn’t actually find this out until we finally crawled to the end of the line.
Since K-96 ends (as you can see on the map), we didn’t have a choice but to take I-135 North. Our original thought was to exit and loop back to take I-135 South but then while driving North we noticed that traffic on I-135 South wasn’t moving at all. It was bumper to bumper and the cars were totally still. Think of LA traffic on a really, really bad day. Like when aliens are about to take over the world like in the movie Independence Day. I-135 South was definitely out of the question at this point.
Brian’s idea was to take I-135 North, which hits I-235, so we could take that freeway South. There’s a Broadway exit on I-235 so I told Brian to get off there. My idea was to take Broadway to downtown Wichita, which is a straight shot. I mean, I figured with the foggy weather conditions as they were, we’ll more than likely encounter other wrecks on the other freeways. Besides, it’s common knowledge that everyone else takes the freeways to work so it gets trafficky during rush hour anyway. Brian insisted on taking I-235 all the way around to Kellogg (US Highway 54) and then taking Kellogg East to the Central Business District exit.
Irked, I go “Can you get me there in ten minutes? I can guarantee you I can get from I-235 and Broadway to my work in ten.”
Brian goes, “But that’s 40 mph with stop lights. We’re going to go 70 mph with no lights.”
Notice how he cleverly avoids saying that he can beat, or even match, my ten minute time challenge. He knows he can’t. He’s just rationalizing at this point.
If it’s trafficky and there’s wrecks, you can’t go your full 70 mph anyway. So what good does using the freeway do? Nothing. It just aggravates me.
As we’re passing the Central exit, I said to myself “We would’ve been there by now had we taken Broadway.”
Just to prove my point I call Nick to find out if Broadway was trafficky. He lives by 29th and Broadway so he takes Broadway to work everyday and it only takes him ten minutes. I got voicemail.
We finally get to Kellogg which, despite the newly constructed fly overs, is trafficky as I expected. Brian begins to realize that I’m right at this point but refuses to admit it. It really annoys the shit out of me when people just can’t admit that they’re wrong.
I told Brian that I will prove to him that my way is better so I’m posting it here. We’ve got both routes mapped up. I must say, it’s pretty obvious isn’t it?
So the Jason-bacon was in a stripper sandwich after poker last Thursday.. And Corey goes, “It’s only good as long as it’s not made with sourdough bread.” I think sourdough is the least of your worries. It’s the cottage cheese that you have to worry about! Ha! Ha! Ha! Brian and I wanted to give Jason the gift of Ridd the next day but we figured that he probably already had some in his medicine cabinet seeing as he’s been ho-baggin’ for years. He’s probably got some other stuff in there, too. I’m making a mental note to take a picture of it for you guys next time I’m over.
It doesn’t work either. I play tight, I get knocked out. I play loose, I get knocked out. Absolutely nothing has worked for me. So I decided on Saturday that I would dress in a school girl outfit to play poker on Sunday. Well, apparently that doesn’t work either. Jason says that I didn’t use my costume to its full potential because I didn’t play the part and do the “Hee, hee, hee.. I’m so clueless at this game.. This is the first time I’ve played.. Am I doing it right? Giggles.. Giggles..” APL guy Brian suggested playing “crazy monkey poker” (whatever that means). On Saturday Jason had me read this Bluff article on the way to lunch. It was written by Annie Duke. She was saying that females have an advantage over male poker players because men tend to think with their other brain sometimes. The idea is to take advantage of the “flirters” and to provoke anger and irritation from the “chauvinists” which will help one distract their opponents from their game. Easier said than done. I think it’s because I’m too self-conscious to be anyone else. The outfit was pretty easy, though. I am always adventurous when it comes to clothing anyway. I knew I got it right when Jason’s first reaction was, “Why did you LET her wear that? I was only joking yesterday.” In my defense and taking pride in his accomplishment, Brian retorts “I helped her dress!” Jason goes, “I can’t even look at you!” Well, that’s what you get. I’m pretty impressionable so I’ll go with anything. With me, you really have to be careful what you wish for because I’ll do it. They asked for it! At the coliseum I stuck out like a sore thumb among the hundreds of poker players. Jason had to give me props on the outfit. Even in the parking lot I was getting looks. Inside he commented on the fact that we had yet to pass a group of men who didn’t look our way. I’m thinking they’re probably confused, wondering what the hell I’m doing there. I can surmise that they’re probably saying to themselves, “Is she lost? This is a poker tournament.” That aside, Jason ran into his friend Gary right before lunch. Gary was one of the organizers of the poker tournament that Jason won. Remember when he won $950 for first place? That tournament. I think I may have written about it in the other blog. So Jason was telling Gary how his friend’s wife read the Annie Duke article in the most recent issue of Bluff Magazine and decided to dress up today. Gary was like “Dude, have you seen the Asian girl dressed as a school girl?” To which Jason could only reply, “Yup.. That would be her.” I don’t know if I was a source of embarrassment for everyone or a source of amusement. I seriously hope it’s the latter. I just want to have fun. I don’t want people to be embarrassed to be seen with me. Yikes! Yeah, I’m a character alright. Speaking of character, I think I may be a character in a local poker show. They had me wired with a mic and followed me around with a camera on Saturday. I was pretty boring, though, so I’m not sure if I’ll make the cut. It would be cool if I do. I’ll keep you all posted.
