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The Trips You Don’t Plan On Taking

Posted on January 23, 2025 by under Health, Life.    

We had two exciting trips to the ER this week. About 10-15 years ago we made a few trips to the ER because of my health issues. This time it was Brian’s turn. Kansas Medical Center (KMC) is our “go to” ER hospital. My first experience with KMC was when I fainted while enjoying our anniversary dinner at YaYa’s in 2011. That’s where the ambulance took me. We’ve been going there ever since.

Now that I know it’s there, that’s where we go any time we have some kind of health emergency because it’s relatively close to our house and it’s on the East side (our preferred side of town).

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Since Monday was a holiday, I took advantage of my day off to go with Brian to his IV hydration appointment. We had a nice leisurely day and we just hung out at home and watched a movie the rest of the afternoon. After watching Back In Action together, Brian decided he would go lay down in the bedroom because he was tired and not feeling great. Before he went to the bedroom, I asked him several times if we should call the doctor and ask for advice. He told me no and that he was just going to lay down and try to sleep it off. It was still early so I decided to watch Emilia Perez. About the time my movie is over, he comes back out and he’s still not feeling good. It’s around 8-ish so probably too late to call the doctor. I don’t know what to do so I suggest we go to the ER and get him checked out.

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We arrived at the ER around 8:30 pm on Monday evening. He explained everything to the ER doctor (Rundell-Little). They do a CT scan of his abdomen and we had to wait a long time for the results. The tech who can read these leaves at 5 pm so they have to send it to another location for review. Depending on how busy the hospital is, it could take a while to get results back. Anyway, we finally got the results back and there was nothing wrong with his abdomen. Feeding tube area looked good. Doctor did note that he had stool that he needed to move (read: poop out) and that was likely causing the discomfort. While we were there waiting, Brian hacked up a bunch of mucus build up and expelling that stuff seemed to make him feel better. The congestion was probably contributing to the pain he was feeling so, not thinking anything more of it, we were released from the ER (with instructions for Brian to have a bowel movement) and got home around midnight.

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Honestly, I don’t think I would have been as insistent about going to the ER if not for Brian’s blood clot that was diagnosed last week. He’s on Eliquis for it but blood clots can cause all sorts of problems including a stroke. I didn’t want to go to bed and wake up to something bad happening to Brian. He was in a lot of pain so he wasn’t going to be able to sleep either. We had to go to the ER to get a professional opinion. If anything, it gave me piece of mind that there was nothing seriously wrong with him so I could at least sleep easier (albeit not as long because we were up until midnight and I had work the next day).

Brian has been working from home a lot so he worked from home on Tuesday. I normally work in the office Tuesday through Thursday so I went to work as normal on Tuesday but checked on him throughout the day. On the way home I picked up some more Pedialyte for him because the doctor recommended he drink it instead of just plain water. I guess he still didn’t have a bowel movement on Tuesday. At this point it’s been over a month, nearly two, since his last poop.

Wednesday I go to work as normal. Called him around 10 am to make sure he was up and feeding and taking his medication. Here’s the how the rest of that morning went according to Brian. Around noon, he starts to get around because he was going to drop off a package for me at the post office. As he is leaving, he feels the urge to poop. So then he goes to the bathroom but he has been super constipated because of the chemo so he can’t poop. He tries for two hours and he didn’t call me because he didn’t want to bother me at work. Around 2-ish he sends me the following text: I’m sorry to bother. I’m in trouble.

I immediately call him to figure out what’s going on. He tells me he is in so much pain from trying to poop and he is cramping so bad that his right hand is in a fist and he cannot open it. He is afraid he is going to pass out. Not wanting an Elvis situation, I tell him I’m coming home to take him to the ER. I rush home and we make it to the ER around 2:45 pm. I contacted Sheila Hodson (my group exercise coordinator at the West YMCA) to tell her I put my 6:30 pm Zumba class on the sub board because I wasn’t sure how long we would be there. I tried to look for someone to sub and posted in the Zumba messenger chat but its too short notice and everyone teaches classes at different locations at the same time. Anyway, my thought was I did bring my Zumba clothes to work that day so I had them with me. Worst case scenario, I would drive from KMC to the West Y, teach my class, and then come back. If Brian got released before I got back, then he could get a ride home from his cousin Zach Hyatt who lives down the street. Sheila was super understanding and encouraged me to stay with Brian. She reassured me that, if we could not find a sub, we could just cancel class. I really appreciated it because, while I would have done it, that was a lot of driving back and forth from Andover to the West side of town. And, there’s no way I could have taught class last night because we did not get released until almost 9 pm.

At the ER, they did an x-ray of Brian’s stomach and confirmed fecal impaction. I have heard of this happening to people but have never experienced it personally. Well, we can now cross this off the list because I now have almost first hand knowledge of what this is like. Brian said many times, he felt like he was going to die. He felt so much pain every time he tried to poop and he had really bad cramping all over his body (including his legs and his right fist not wanting to open). The was no way he could move this stool without assistance.

I only took one photo last night (the one below) because I felt so bad for him. He was writhing in pain.

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First the nurse gave him an enema and let it sit for 30-40 minutes to see if it would trigger some pooping action. Brian tried but only expelled the enema liquid and no poop. A little bit later, she have him a bigger enema — 1 whole liter of soapy water solution. She let that sit for a while and then had Brian try to poop again. Once again, Brian expelled the enema liquid but no poop. In the meantime, it smelled god-awful in that exam room. I was like, “Are you sure there is no poop coming out because it sure smells like it?”

Anyway, since the enemas were not working, the nurse decided it was time to go “digital” — yes, friends, she was going to dig it out of him. OMG. I cannot imagine. She was probably wondering how she got the short straw and hoping that she had called in sick to work that day. She was a good sport thought. At one point, we rang for her and another nurse came. We thought she gave up and ran away but she was just busy with other patients. The doc on duty (Tucker) did warn us that they are a very busy emergency room.

Nurse Shawna came back to check on us and asked Brian why he didn’t want X (I can’t remember the other nurse’s name) to do “the thing” (read: dig the poop out of his ass). Brian was like, “She has big fingers.” I could not stop laughing. As tiny as nurse Shawna’s fingers are, it was still super painful for Brian. He screamed every time. She would get some of it out before he couldn’t take anymore and they’d have to take a break. She would leave, come back, and they would try again. This pattern repeated 2-3 times and she would get little bits out each time. And then around 7 pm, I had to go home and take care of Saki. She had not been fed as we’d been at the ER since 3 pm that afternoon.

When I returned, it was pretty much done. Brian said I missed the most horrible and gross parts. They gave him another enema (third time’s the charm) while I was gone. I guess whatever the nurse was doing loosened it up enough to where the enema actually worked. Shit was gushing out of him. The nurse asked him if he wanted to move to the toilet but he couldn’t stop it. She could barely keep up with replacing one poop pad after another. It sounded disgusting and I’m glad I wasn’t in the room for that part. By the time I got back, they had him mostly cleaned up. He said his stomach was feeling burbly. I encouraged him to try and poop before we leave. I really didn’t want him feeling like has to poop on the drive home or, worse, poop in the car. This last attempt was a success. He managed to poop the rest of the nearly two months worth of shit in his colon out. I could tell that he felt better after that. Imagine having two months worth of poop in your belly. I actually think he’s down to 130 pounds after. It was a crap ton – literally.

We were discharged at 8:40 pm and home by 9-ish. I helped him get in the shower – he needed it! Anyway, we are going to have to stay on top of this poop thing, in additional to all the other things. This whole cancer journey has been quite a ride. For the first time ever we actually completely tapped out our HSA account. As in, there’s no more money in it. Not sure if it will have been replenished in time for when these ER bills come due but we will cross that bridge when we get there. I’m just really grateful that Brian is okay and we are finally past this poop thing.

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December Round Up

Posted on January 18, 2025 by under Things to Do.    

December is one of my favorite times of the year because of all the fun, festive holiday pop-ups. There’s also lots of activities to do. Wild Light at Sedgwick County Zoo is something that starts in October so it’s not technically a December event but it is a fun, seasonal activity that we look forward to each year. The last couple of years we have gone with Kendra Wicks and Colby Fugit. We always enjoy looking at the new displays with them.

Similar to Wild Lights at the zoo, Illuminations at Botanica is something that we also enjoy doing. Brian didn’t have enough energy to go this year so I went with Colby and Grant and Susie Ternes. (NOTE: Grant isn’t pictured below because he took our photo.)

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Here are some highlights from my favorite holiday pop-ups.

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At Chicken N Pickle’s Holiday Hideaway with Susie

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Jingle at Public at the Brickyard

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Sippin’ Santa at Dockum

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Miracle on Mosley Street at River City Brewing Co.

Susie and Colby organized a holiday pop-up pub crawl with Cindy Egan, Molly Sager and Nicole Mathis while Molly and Nicole were in town for Ryan Kellenbarger’s benefit tournament for ICT SOS. It was so fun hanging out with the ladies and experiencing the wonderful holiday pop-ups with them.

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Speaking of Ryan’s charity tournament for ICT SOS, he had it at Tap N Paddles. It was their first tournament at the facility which just opened in November. The tournament had an amazing turnout.

Cindy had her annual Christmas party which was super fun. We also had a pickleball party and white elephant at the Pickle Club. While the month of December had some fun events and activities, this was also the month that Brian really started struggling with eating. He quit joining Chris and me for lunches. Despite this, I did manage to get him out for an outing.

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Final outing until things started to get really tough. Hoping we have finally turned the corner, though. Until next time!

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Hurrah for Modern Medicine and Great Friends

Posted on January 5, 2025 by under Health, Life.    

With Cindy and Ed Egan, and Lou and Kory Parkhurst at Deano’s East.

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When we first got Brian’s diagnosis, our friend Cindy told us that she has another friend who went through the exact same thing about ten years ago. We both agreed that it would be great to meet this couple and kind of hear about their experience, etc. Cindy arranged the dinner and we were actually supposed to meet at Wine Dive, closer to where the Parkhursts’ live, but Cindy had a crazy busy weekend (both she and Ed had pickleball tournaments that day) and so we had a last minute location change to Deano’s to be closer to the Egans’.

The funny part is we were just at Deano’s West the night before with some friends because I wanted to check out the fancy new location. Everything is the same food/drink menu-wise, the only difference because the new West side location is on a lake so if you’re out on the patio then you have better views. Nonetheless, the food didn’t matter to us. We were anxious to meet Kory and Lou and hear about their journey, how they got through it, and get their advice.

It was super helpful meeting Kory and Lou. Seeing Kory, looking happy and healthy 10 years later, really lifted our spirits. All the doctors were very positive that Brian would get through this okay but you don’t really know. Meeting someone who has gone through the very thing that you’re suffering from, and getting their insights was completely invaluable. I am beyond grateful to Cindy for making this dinner happen, which was the night before Brian’s first radiation treatment.

Kory’s cancer was nearly identical to Brian’s. His was further along and he also had his feeding tube installed before treatments began. Because he is a slender guy to begin with, their doctors determined that he couldn’t afford to lose any weight at all. Whereas with Brian, we were hopeful that he wouldn’t need a feeding tube at all. Wishful thinking on our part because once Brian hit 150 lbs, we were like, okay now we need to do something because he can’t lose anymore weight. In hindsight, we should have listened to Dr. Chris Dakhil and had the feeding tube installed early. You may or may not need it but it’s there if you do. It’ll help keep your nutrition up which is important because it’s hard to fight the good fight when you have zero energy. Which is what Brian’s going through now. He has zero energy to do anything. He is fatigued and tired all the time and all he wants to do is sleep.

We thought that we would not have any problems getting the feeding tube installed halfway through but we failed to take the holidays into account. By the time we decided to pull the trigger on the feeding tube, we had run into Christmas and New Year, and Dr. Imad Nassif only does these surgeries on Wednesdays so the first available date was January 8. You live and you learn. We know now but hoping we don’t have to use this knowledge ever again.

Anyway, it’s amazing to me how far we’ve come. It used to be getting diagnosed with cancer was a death sentence. I suppose a lot of it depends on the kind of cancer you have and how far along it has progressed unchecked. But, as unfortunate as it is for Brian to have gotten cancer, he is at least fortunate enough to have the kind that can be treated. We are meeting more and more cancer survivors which makes me think modern medicine has advanced enough that more and more people are winning the battle. We are hopeful that Brian will get through this just as Kory has and this will all be a faint memory a decade from now.

Here’s a picture of the two Deano’s locations for comparison:

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This is a picture of the front of the OG Deano’s where we had dinner with the Parkhursts and Egans on Sunday night. It’s located at Cambridge Market, which is actually around the corner from Quarters at Cambridge where Brian and I used to live over 10 years ago.

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This is a picture of the front of the new West location where we had dinner with other friends the previous night.

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My Pickleball Sabbatical aka 2024 Year-End Recap

Posted on January 1, 2025 by under Life, Pickleball, Zumba.    

Before we dive in to the 2024 year-end recap, let’s catch you all up first.

  • 2002 — This is the year that Brian and I were married and the year that I started this blog.
  • 2003 — I had originally dropped out of college in 2000 when my four-year scholarship money ran out. I decided I didn’t want to take out student loans. Anyway, I started working for my current employer in May 2002. After a year, I realized I was eligible for tuition reimbursement/assistance so this is the year that I went back to school. This is also the year that I discovered online poker. Brian also started our 24/7 live cam.
  • 2004 — I officially became a naturalized US citizen, continued kicking butt at school, and after a couple of years as a customer service representative was promoted to supervise my team. This was a rough year for our marriage. Brian struggled with depression and was prescribed Zoloft which was super rough for our sex life. We pursued hobbies like poker (went from playing online to playing bar poker and playing in local tournaments), racquetball, chess, and blogging to get us through.
  • 2005 — This year saw Brian through a couple of job changes. He first worked for Cox Communications and then later that year quit that job to start working for Engenio Technologies which later because LSI and then NetApp. We also got sugar gliders this year.

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  • 2006 — I graduated from Wichita State with my Business Administration degree (Management Information Systems major and minors in Accounting and Management). Rewarded myself with my first brand new car (a 2006 Toyota Corolla we named Bebot) and a puppy. However, since I went straight into grad school to pursue my MBA (still at WSU), I was never home and Molly bonded with Brian more so than me. I was super into poker around this time and even Brian was starting to get into it too.
  • 2007 — Brian was super into World of Warcraft around this time. I played some but knew instantly I would get addicted so I tried my best to stay away from it. Plus, all my time was consumed by grad school and my poker addiction. LOL. This year was our first major travel vacation since our honeymoon. We went to Couples Tower Isle in Jamaica and had our first nude beach experience.

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  • 2023 — I continued to play in pickleball tournaments but decided to focus more on local and regional ones. Aside from US Open, USA Pickleball Nationals, one PPA tournament, and one APP tournament, most of my tournaments were local and within driving distance. It was an eventful year and I got to meet a ton of people from all over the world. Brian and I also had our first colonoscopies that year. He doesn’t have to go again for 10 years but I’m due back in 2028.

Now that we are all caught up, let’s talk about 2024. At the end of 2023, after doing the math, and after enduring several blind dates at tournaments, and after having some health issues that I needed to sort out, I decided to take a tournament sabbatical. That didn’t mean I wasn’t playing. I still played recreationally but just took a break from playing in tournaments this year.

I was having some major abdominal cramping in 2023 so toward the end of the year we decided to put me on birth control pills to help regulate my menstrual cycle. That seemed to help but that wasn’t the end of my problems.

At the beginning of the year I decided to switch to monovision. For a couple of years my eyesight had started to deteriorate. I guess that’s what happens when you turn 40. Basically, my brain can’t process the correction from my lenses like it used to. When I have my contact lenses on (which is what I use to correct my nearsightedness), I struggle with reading small print up close including my phone. It got to the point where I actually had to enlarge my phone’s font size. However, when I don’t have my contacts in, I can see up close perfectly fine. My optometrist had suggested monovision the year before when I first started having problems but I thought it was weird so I hesitated to try it but it had gotten so bad earlier this year that I was finally willing to give it a shot. So now, I just wear a contact in one eye (my right eye) and I use that eye to see things far away and my left eye is what I use to see things up close. It’s amazing that it actually works. Although, it did take a bit of an adjustment at first because my brain couldn’t figure out if my computer monitor is up close or far away at first. I’m used to it now for regular day to day activities like driving and such but I do still struggle with pickleball because sometimes the ball is far away and then it’s coming right at you and I just don’t think I’m processing it fast enough. I feel like I would play better with both contact lenses in, at least for playing pickleball. When I start playing in tournaments again, that will be something I’ll have to consider.

On top of all of that, I felt my tennis elbow returning and it actually caused me to have serving yips. I am still kind of yippy although my arm pain is pretty much gone. I had to switch to a drop serve because the yips made my volley serve completely unreliable. While I was nursing my tennis elbow and arm issues, I had to cut back on playing and decided to do more Zumba. Well, then I did too much Zumba and my right knee started bothering me. It got to the point where I had to cut back on that activity as well. Getting old really sucks.

Brian had his own share of issues as well. He actually had three root canals which didn’t really resolve the massive infection issue (which looked like a cyst) in his mouth so then he had to schedule oral surgery but then the week of the oral surgery they couldn’t do it because he had some kind of tonsil infection. The oral surgeon wanted him to take care of his tonsil infection first before doing the oral surgery so that the surgery spot wouldn’t get infected. So then Brian goes to an ear, nose, and throat doctor who decides the best course of action is a tonsillectomy. Leading up to his tonsillectomy, his lymph note was swollen so the ENT doc decided they should biopsy his lymph node. He gets this done on the Monday before the Thursday surgery. Biopsy results in finding cancer in the lymph node. ENT doc thinks cancer in lymph node came from his tonsil so then the tonsillectomy turned into a laryngoscopy and tonsil biopsy. I posted about Brian’s cancer journey here, which isn’t actually over. Brian has his final chemo treatment tomorrow and radiation treatments continue through next week.

Anyway, despite this being my “tournament free” year there were a lot of pickleball events that happened — mostly things I either organized or ran like the mixed doubles tournament at Picklebally’s, InPickle Nation’s (IPN) Wichita Winterfest, the Epic Pickleball Tournament at Wichita Country Club benefiting the Wichita Children’s Home, St. Patty’s Day team tournament at the Pickle Club, IPN 3v3 team tournament, Picklemania MMXXIV benefiting the Rotary Club of Andover, Picklepalooza benefiting Senior Services of Wichita, the Dink Minor League team tournament at Crestview Country Club, and a whole bunch of mini tournaments at the Pickle Club along with the weekly IPN round robin mini tournaments.

I introduced some friends to pickleball and invited them to one of the Newbie Nights at Chicken N Pickle, tried to participate in as many CNP ambassador plays as I could throughout the year, and took advantage of other CNP events. My most favorite one being the CNP Wichita vs Kansas City Ambassador Showdown at the Overland Park location. My friend Christ Pink from St. Louis came to Wichita for work and it was a lot of fun entertaining her on both trips. In addition to rec play or facilitating pickleball, I played in a couple of leagues — a team league with Susie Ternes, Matt Von Feldt, and Austin Winter at the beginning of the year and women’s doubles with Julie Egy at the end of the year.

I think the highlight of the year for me was finally getting to visit Tres Palapas. Brian was supposed to go with us but due to his cancer diagnosis he ended up having to sit out. Though he totally could have gone because his treatments didn’t start until after I returned from Mexico due to delays with getting insurance approvals. Brian also had some trips that I skipped including trips to Oklahoma, Mississippi, and Nebraska. The Nebraska trip he did with his dad to bury his grandmother who passed away earlier this year, a couple of months before her 102nd birthday.

Brian is not so keen on international travel so for his 50th birthday we went to Omaha and for our 22nd wedding anniversary we went to Colorado Springs. That’s actually really funny because we totally forgot that we had already been there.

Lastly, not pickleball or travel related, I had my first jury duty experience. It was quite interesting. Anyway, that pretty much sums up 2024. Can’t wait to see what 2025 has in store. Happy New Year, everyone!

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Nice Dinners in Los Barriles

Posted on December 25, 2024 by under Food and Drink, Travel.    

Pictures from two of our dinners in Los Barriles. We wouldn’t have been able to go to these fabulous restaurants as easily without our new friend Jim who happened to have a rental car. They fon’t have Uber or Lift in Los Barriles. They have something called DiDi but I wasn’t really keen on downloading a new app. Anyway, we made his five-seater SUV work by putting me in the trunk.

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The first set of pictures is from La Terraza, this fantastic Italian restaurant downtown. The place isn’t very big and we got lucky that we arrived at just the right time. We got a perfect table next to the road. It was great in a way because it felt like we were dining outside but also weird in that we heard everything going on out on the street down below. There was lots of honking that night. Not sure what it was about but almost every single vehicle that passed by the restaurant honked.

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Here are some pics of our food and drinks.

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Julie said this is the best chicken parm she’d ever had and I thought the was over-exaggerating until I had a bite. I had to agree. The breaded chicken was cooked to perfection and had a nice crunch to it.

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My dinner (pictured above) was great and I absolutely loved their flan.

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Obligatory group selfie outside the restaurant…

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The next night, our group went to La Playa. It’s a super cute restaurant along the beach where we enjoyed some pretty drinks and more delicious food.

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I ordered the flan here as well for comparison. I liked the flan they serve at La Terraza better.

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This place has the better view and location though, and they give you your bill in these cute boxes. I almost wanted to take mine with me.

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Picture of Julie and Brady at dinner.

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The stray dogs are everywhere and they are absolutely adorable. I would have adopted this one if only I had a way to bring him home.

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I’m thinking I want to go back in an RV that way we can smuggle all the stray dogs across the border and give them homes. The dogs were so sweet and I felt really bad thinking of them just roaming around without owners to take care of them.

Anyway that’s all for now. Hope you are having a wonderful Christmas. Until next time!

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