{"id":1185,"date":"2008-09-20T06:05:15","date_gmt":"2008-09-20T12:05:15","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/brubakers.us\/?p=1185"},"modified":"2008-09-20T06:47:39","modified_gmt":"2008-09-20T12:47:39","slug":"i-may-just-kill-myself-this-weekend","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/brubakers.us\/?p=1185","title":{"rendered":"I May Just Kill Myself this Weekend"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I was back on the workout wagon and then off again.  The last couple of weeks, I haven&#8217;t been able to work out during the week because of various things coming up.  Sometimes we&#8217;ve got other, more pressing, things going on after work.  Other times I bring my workout gear to work with the full intention of working out after work, but am unable to change into my workout clothes because I&#8217;m super busy or I get stuck on an escalation or question.  I hate going to the workout classes late because everyone is already doing the warm up or the exercise or whatever while you&#8217;re walking in there and then you still have to put your equipment together (if there&#8217;s any left, we routinely run out of weights in muscle pump because people lift tonnage), be it step, barbell, free weights, bands etc.  By the time you&#8217;re warmed up and ready to go, the class is halfway or, worse yet, it&#8217;s over.  Besides that, some workout classes are so popular that the room gets so crowded.  Unless you&#8217;re there to stake claim to your spot, there&#8217;s really not any room for you (core class is like this).<\/p>\n<p>Even though I&#8217;ve consistently missed my weekday workouts the past couple of weeks, I&#8217;ve gone religiously the past couple of weekends.  I did my two workout classes on Saturday, and even lived through two workout classes on Sunday.  However, consistently making it to my weekday workouts has been my Moby Dick so to speak.<\/p>\n<p>I know this is kind of a cop out because I promised myself a little while ago that I will go to the gym regardless of how late I am for the workout class.  I had vowed just to get on the treadmill, and wait for the next class to begin instead of nixing my entire workout altogether.  I haven&#8217;t delivered on that promise at all lately the last two weeks.  So I guess I&#8217;m feeling some guilt over trying to rationalize missing my workouts.  That might be the reason that I might just try to kill myself this weekend.<\/p>\n<div class=\"adleft\"><iframe src=\"http:\/\/rcm.amazon.com\/e\/cm?t=lifeafter-20&#038;o=1&#038;p=8&#038;l=as1&#038;asins=B000MNP2KI&#038;fc1=000000&#038;IS2=1&#038;lt1=_blank&#038;m=amazon&#038;lc1=0000FF&#038;bc1=000000&#038;bg1=FFFFFF&#038;f=ifr\" style=\"width:120px;height:240px;\" scrolling=\"no\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" frameborder=\"0\"><\/iframe><\/div>\n<p>I have been sneezing non-stop.  I have super congestion, and am blowing gross green snot out of my nose (not the usual clear stuff).  I can seriously feel how much snot I have in my head because of my facial sensations.  I have a sinus headache, sore throat, and a bit of a fever.  Also, I noticed that I&#8217;ve developed an eye twitch (left side) the last couple of days. I don&#8217;t know if that&#8217;s because my sinus cavities are overloaded with snot or what, but I was thinking about it last night while playing poker.  I thought, gosh I hope that my eye doesn&#8217;t start twitching in the middle of a hand or the other players might think I&#8217;m bluffing kind of like that bad guy in <a target=\"_blank\" href=\"http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/gp\/product\/B000MNP2KI?ie=UTF8&#038;tag=lifeafter-20&#038;linkCode=as2&#038;camp=1789&#038;creative=9325&#038;creativeASIN=B000MNP2KI\" >Casino Royale<\/a><img loading=\"lazy\" src=\"http:\/\/www.assoc-amazon.com\/e\/ir?t=lifeafter-20&#038;l=as2&#038;o=1&#038;a=B000MNP2KI\" width=\"1\" height=\"1\" border=\"0\" alt=\"\" style=\"border:none !important; margin:0px !important;\" \/>.  That was a great movie.<\/p>\n<p>But I digress&#8230; What I&#8217;m trying to say is that, I&#8217;m going to my usual Saturday workouts today despite how horrible I&#8217;m feeling right now.  I think, in part, I&#8217;m trying to punish myself for not working out during the week.  For reneging on my promise.  For not being as dedicated as I should be.  If I fail, then this could go very, very badly.  If I succeed, however, I may just scare the bejeezus out of my sickness.  Maybe I can get it to go away by showing it how tough I am?  I am the boss of my body, and I say that I&#8217;m not going to sick right now.  Take that, sickness!  How about that, huh?<\/p>\n<p>P.S. As part of my death wish, I&#8217;ve also only had less than five hours of sleep today.  We didn&#8217;t get home from poker until midnight.  We chowed down on some fried chicken as soon as we got home because we had the munchies.  That probably wasn&#8217;t a very good idea, but I was thinking maybe I could add heart attack to my list of possible causes of death.  Since we ate, we couldn&#8217;t go to bed right away so it was probably almost two in the morning by the time we were wound down enough to go to sleep.  And, guess what.  I&#8217;m up right now blogging.  I&#8217;ve been up since six o&#8217;clock or so.  I&#8217;ll let you know how I fare this weekend.  Wish me luck.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I was back on the workout wagon and then off again. The last couple of weeks, I haven&#8217;t been able to work out during the week because of various things coming up. Sometimes we&#8217;ve got other, more pressing, things going on after work. Other times I bring my workout gear to work with the full [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[10,13,16],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/brubakers.us\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1185"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/brubakers.us\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/brubakers.us\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brubakers.us\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brubakers.us\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1185"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/brubakers.us\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1185\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1190,"href":"https:\/\/brubakers.us\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1185\/revisions\/1190"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/brubakers.us\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1185"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brubakers.us\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1185"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brubakers.us\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1185"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}