2012…Because I have to get this over with.

It was a year of taking back my life. It was the year a life was taken from me:



I had a lot of grim and gloom which I’m glad I can erase, maybe not in the wholest of forms, but in some way.

I started Zumba:


Mainly because my sister taught the classes, and she bribed me with free Zumba gear. It’s great cardio, but as I found out, it can also help with muscle tone with the help of 2lb weights for each hand and ankle.

This is just 15 minutes of an hour of non-stop dancing. Now imagine the weights on each limb. I wish you could see the faces Nicole and I are making to each other. To top it off, the class we usually go to was on Saturday mornings. That’s hangover aerobics, y’all. Yeah, the peppy girl in the front is my sister. SMH.

My Cousing Reuel and his wife Sonnie visited from Norway:






Got a couple books knocked off my read list:



Joined the Electronic Cigarette Club:

Originally bought it, just to tie me over for the winter, and forgot to go back to real cigs since. Actually, working on cutting this down, as well. Started on 24mg nicotine, down to 18mg, and now on 6mg. My next bottle is already bought and it’s at 0mg. I’m fairly excited.

Did a TuTu Experiment:

The Trials and Tribulations of Wearing a Tutu October 21, 2012

Anthony and friend spots a little girl wearing a tutu. Something said like “it’s only cute because she doesn’t know better” I say, “I can wear a tutu and make it cute”, something like “do it then” something about 7 days and needing pictures to prove it. Obviously the how and why got vague, but in the end I was in a mission to prove that not only could I wear a tutu for 7 days, I would wear it and no one would treat me any differently even if I was a grown adult that should know better. From my perspective, regardless of how you’re dressed and how you look, the way people treat is the exact reflection of how you carry yourself. And if you don’t know me, I carry myself with a bit of an air. I’m awesome like that.

So it begins with a plea. Asking coworkers “Anyone have a tutu or know a place I can get a tutu?” One coworker, Christina, has access to tutus, they are her little daughter’s, and yes, I borrowed from that little girl. Please, don’t even try judging me based one that tiny detail, the air up here is too dense. When I get hold of said tutus (there were two) I put one on and started the show.

Day 1 Wednesday

Everyone makes a statement about how “cute” it is. I say my thanks and try to act nonchalant as to not bring attention to it, because then that wouldn’t make my point at all. People aren’t supposed to notice the tutu. But then Julie, another coworker, who I told about my little experiment, starts to tell people at work commenting on it, that it’s an experiment. It’s one of those, laugh and shake your head moments, and I tell her that experiments don’t usually work when people know that it’s an experiment. Anyway, after about an hour or two or three, normal work resumes. Until, of course, nature calls and I start staring at the damned tutu trying to figure out if I should hold it up or pull it down. So far, the most inconvenient thing about tutus.

Got home, watched TV, until Matt came by to get Quentin. I run upstairs to verify Jen’s upcoming birthday, and before I could finish my question “Nice tutu” Ugh. I forgot I was still wearing it. “Thanks. When is Jen’s birthday?” The tutu has now become a distraction, and a reason for people to interrupt me. Grrrr.

Day 2 Thursday

I get up and do my morning routine of preparing my drive to work coffee. Mom asks “Costume day at work already?” “No, just me.” I realized that I had timed the tutu experiment right near Halloween and for an entire week people are going to think that I keep getting my days wrong. That’s fine. I arrive at work, and everyone is still excited that I’m wearing the tutu. Pass a male coworker in the halls “Two days in a row? You need a new tutu.” Then I realized that even though there is a second one, I would refuse to change it, because it seems that would pacify some people more. I do love making my life difficult, it’s why it’s so fun. Sales coach during the day asks “What’s the point of the tutu?” apparently, Julie didn’t get to her, so I briefly answered “It makes me feel pretty.” Work resumes per usual. I am in a constant watch for my numbers and getting the month finished with my metrics on the up and up. The only tutu related difficulty for the day (besides when going to the restroom) was the fact that they kept crumpling up when I sat down. Then everytime I would stand up, any older female coworker with the hint of motherly instincts would always have to urge to “fluff” my back side. Unsettling, but also got me to wonder why tutus made people forget the simple matter of boundaries. Curious. Went to the bar that night as well. No major comments from the regulars, they never really need explanations, but here’s a picture anyway.

Day 3 Friday

Early morning doctor’s appointment. My main concern was “How am I going to ask anyone to take my picture there?” Sat in the lobby, an older couple mentioned the tutu but they spoke too softly to each other for me to decipher the words, I looked at them and they smiled without making eye contact. Old people are sweet in a very creepy way. I get called by the nurse and she asks how I was but never mentioned my tutu. Which is funny considering where I got my shot that day. I took the picture myself.

My tutu was sore for the rest of the work day. Which made it very awkward I think for the guy that worked in the next cube. I kept saying out loud that my “tutu hurts”. (I have a theory that if you say your problems out loud, it alleviates them somehow. i.e. I always tell people when I am hungry, and that always helps until lunch time comes.)

That night Dustin had invited me to go to a bon fire. I dressed myself according the the night’s chilly weather and then had to make a quick judgement call on the tutu. I didn’t want to be responsible for the smell, or even worst, getting the tulle singed. Yes, I skipped the tutu that night. You can’t punish me, I’m on the interwebs.

Day 4 Saturday

Early morning Zumba with Ching. Ching, if you know her is almost always giddy in a very high pitch sing songy way “Awwwww, I like your tutu.” I didn’t expect different from her. After Zumba we drove to her house, ate with Brian, then I left to get ready for my Halloween celebrations for the night. First stop was Target. Crap! First public place where I don’t know anyone, and people are just going to stare. Walked around, looked through pets to see if I wanted to wear a collar for the kitty costume decided against it, walked through socks and hosiery looking for knee socks because I expected to get cold, then looked at purses so I could get a smaller wristlet to carry. At the end of it, I was sort of disappointed I didn’t notice anyone noticing me. How come I hate it when I prove myself right?

Anyway, tutu did not match the costume so no tutu that night either.

Day 5 Sunday

Hungover, naked in bed most of the day. No tutu. Seriously. Which I think Christina’s daughter would greatly appreciate. Oh, and no picture either, assfucks.

Day 6 Monday

I put my tutu on, to show up to work to take the day off. That’s how I roll. The rest of the day I spent in front of the tv. Like this…

The tutu was starting to get comfortable though, I think I almost wore it to bed. I definitely need my own.

Day 7 Tuesday

It was the last day of the tutu. To be honest I think I was getting fatter each day. I could see gaps where there was garter but not enough tutu. The tutu was giving me a complex not because of other people’s reactions but all by myself. Stupid tutu. Also, great timing, a higher up was visiting and came looking for my immediate supervisor. I felt the responsibility to go up and let him know that she had gone to lunch late and had 10 more minutes left of a regular hour lunch. He said, thanks, and complimented my tutu. A couple of my row mates had a good laugh. But all day I felt a sense of celebration. I was going to be celebrating my own Independence Day. Finally being able to relieve myself without having to put my belt back on through layers upon layers of tulle. No longer having to fluff my back side everytime I sat up. I was looking forward to the end of the work day. Until Ching and Brian invited us to dinner. Carraba’s, me and my tutu. Drinking a Sangria, wearing a dress-up accessory. Fuck you, Anthony.

So, in the instances, when I forgot I was wearing the tutu, it seemed other people forgot it too. So I still think it is in how you carry yourself. Unfortunately, walking around being aware that you are dressed like a wanna-be-bridesmaid-reject-doll will affect how you carry yourself. There were plenty of those moments, and there will be others that may or may not involve a tutu but when that moment strikes best you can do is go with the flow and let them fluff your back side.

I returned both tutus this morning. For Halloween Day I wore my regular clothes – shirt, jeans, hoodie.

And I started getting crafty:

It all started out when I started Zumba and needed easy access to a towel. It was a bit of a hassle running out of place to grab my towel from my bag to wipe off and then run back in place. I looked for my old golf towel since it has a hook and thought I could hook it to a belt loop, but since it was folded lengthwise it was too long to work out with, but I knew I could create one that would work better. I went shopping for supplies.

First attempt:

I made a couple more. Gave one to my sister.

Of course, no big surprise since I hang out at Finns all the time I noticed the bartenders wearing towels by tucking them in their pants. I thought it would be a great idea to make a couple for them too. I got a bit delayed, but finally made a couple. Kyle got his first. This time I got more picturesof step by step on how I made it:

It’s not quite as step by step as some DIY blogs, but I’m not big on instructions anyway. Besides the pictures should speak for themselves. Otherwise, ask me questions or ask me for one.

Final picture is of Kyle with his towel, Amy and Michael should have theirs by tomorrow.

And I celebrated my 32nd birthday:




And I got closer to family:









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