Archive for August 2004
We went to bed pretty early last night, so now I’m up and can’t go back to sleep.Â At least I’m being productive.Â I’m paying off Victoria’s Secret and Express cards.Â Go me!Â Of course, it’ll only be a matter of two weeks before I max them out again.Â And then I’ll be trying to pay them off for months.Â I have been more responsible lately, though.Â Other than those two blouses that I bought for myself at Armani Exchange a couple of weeks ago, I haven’t bought anything for myself.
Mostly, I just get Brian stuff.Â Like the fancy Armani Exchange blazer that we got for him when we were in Kansas City; and then last Thursday, I bought him a couple pairs of bootcut jeans from Aeropostale to update his wardrobe.Â It’s the exact same style but different washes.Â One is a darker tint and the other is a slightly lighter tint.Â You probably won’t be able to tell the difference unless the two pairs of jeans are side by side but at least he has two nice new jeans to wear on Fridays and Saturdays.Â I get tired of seeing the old ones.Â He can just wear those for swordfighting or whatever.
So why buy two pairs of the exact same jeans?Â My philosophy is that if you find something that fits and looks great, you need to buy it in as many colors as you can.Â Some people will disagree.Â But me, being built the way I am, it’s hard to find things that fit.Â It used to be horrible to go shopping because when I was thinner everything I tried on looked good and I felt compelled to buy everything in sight.Â Now that I’ve gotten older and heavier, it’s more challenging to find things that fit that actually look good so I must take advantage whenever I can.
I wish I could dress Brian the way I want.Â I mean, I ask him what he wants me to wear and solicit his opinion all the time.Â I keep hoping that he would start doing the same, so it won’t be like I’m telling him what to wear.Â It’ll be just me giving him my opinion which he has asked for..Â He’s always in these derogatory t-shirts and, don’t get me wrong, I love derogatory t-shirts and the humor in them but sometimes I just want him to dress more sophisticated.Â After all, he is thirty now.Â I want him to be the hot, older guy that everyone wants to shag.
Anyway, I wonder sometimes if I can pull off a The Shape of Things type transformation on Brian.Â I wouldn’t push my luck, though.Â He would bust me in a second and purposely go back to his grungy ways, just to spite me.
We’re supposed to do some house cleaning today.Â I doubt it’s getting done because we are both so lazy.Â Plus, we are planning on watching Hero in the afternoon and then swordfighting with Brent (and others) at Harrison Park in the evening.Â Which is good because whenever we swordfight I am so tired that I sleep really well.Â There is no room for insomnia tonight, as I have to be at work by 7 AM on Monday (at Lance’s request so he can setup my computer).Â I will finally be able to access and print login/logout reports etc.
I’m all for being able to do stuff..Â I mean, I just want to make sure I have the tools and resources I need to do my job effectively because I don’t want to let anyone down..Â So I don’t really mind having to come in so early.Â Besides, I’m usually at work a half an hour early anyway (even as a rep — I hated being late)..Â What’s another half hour?
Jen just came by and brought me a gift.Â She got me a watch while they were in Vegas.Â It’s my pasalubong.Â Perhaps Brian and I can take a trip to Vegas in a few months and I can return the favor.Â Â Â Â
There’s this new hot girl in RE2: Apocalypse.Â I was looking forward to seeing Milla (who I totally loved in The Fifth Element) kick some more zombie ass but now I’ve got another hot ass-kicking girl to watch.
Brian is so excited, he’s fixing to cream himself.Â Â
Yesterday felt different than any other day I’ve ever experienced.Â For the last few years, each day has been the same work-school-home or school-work-home routine.Â The day started in a normal fashion, I suppose..Â Went to work and then I went to my ballroom dance class.Â I arrived only to find out that class had been canceled.Â That was disappointing.
As I was leaving I noticed the sun setting.Â I’ve always loved watching the sun set.Â I’m so busy that I never have time to catch it.Â Yesterday, however, I decided to stop.Â Instead of just rushing and zipping from this place to the next, I stopped.Â I leaned against my car, enjoyed the wonderful late afternoon breeze and watched the sun as it gradually and gracefully fell behind the houses and trees across the street.
Many years ago, before the parking lot outside Duerksen was renovated, there used to be this hill where I loved to just sit and watch the sunset.Â Once in a while, the sprinklers would come on and drive you away.Â But most of the time it was the most relaxing place to be.Â It wasn’t quite the same feeling that I experienced yesterday, but it came pretty close.
Brian and I decided to go to Sumo for dinner last night.Â It’s his favorite place.Â I told him I would wait for him outside.Â It was beautiful day, totally unlike any other day I’ve ever witnessed.Â The colors were different.Â The sky was green and everything else was tinged in a reddish-yellow hue.Â Almost like I was looking at my surroundings through a Photoshop filter that made everything so yellow and picturesque.Â Even the ugly tree on your front lawn appeared beautiful to me.Â I took a picture of it, but my camera phone just could not capture the vivid colors and do the moment justice.
The irony is that I feel calm and tranquil when I should be stressed out.Â With my promotion at work, I am faced with many new challenges.Â I am still attending college classes fulltime and I should be worried about keeping up with my school work.Â I tell myself this each day as if to remind me of how I ought and ought not feel.Â Yet, it seems that I don’t feel as apprehensive as I should.Â There must be something in the air.Â Â